Last night I saw the show Miss Saigon and I’ve never been so moved before. And I was often moved in some scenes that I didn’t seem to quite make sense that I’d cry. Partly, I’d say it was just a superb expression of emotion and the complexity of humanity. But maybe partly it’s because as a person I’m becoming more sensitive to the beauty of the human condition. There was one scene in the show where Kim, the “damsel”, is confronted by her cousin, Thuy, who has come to claim her hand in marriage as promised by her parents years earlier. Kim reveals that she has had a son with an American GI and Thuy goes into a fit of rage. Things quickly get out of control, Thuy looks as if he’s about to kill Kim’s son, and Kim shoots Thuy in defense of her son. And then Kim is devastated and mourns over Thuy’s body. It is a powerful display of how the most noble expression of pure genuine love and vulnerability can at the same time be a devastating blow of hurt, and not that far away from being something horrifying and even despicable. And when you see the full story of those that at first seem despicable and horrible you can find understanding, compassion, even admiration. It’s all so very complicated.


So this morning as I meditated I scanned thru my turmoiled emotions. In Norway, an act of major act of violence has occurred involving the killing of over 70 people. The killer’s publications suggest some anti-Muslim intentions, but you quickly see a disturbed voice, even a psyche that is crying out to be heard despite being so long ignored. For me I found myself wanting to sense the meaning of this act on a global humanity consciousness level rather than as the isolated act of one individual.

I’m deeply saddened that a human had to resort to committing this terrible act. Why? Why? Why? And what will be the repercussions as it stirs up hurt, fear, devastation and counter anger emotions. And then how will those emotions ultimately be expressed or repressed?

I feel for all the dark voices out there. They are dark because we refuse to see or acknowledge them. At first we might be drawn to scan out to the global consciousness and inquire if something is happening to humanity. “Who has been wronged and can we right the wrong?” “Who feels hurt, ignored, and shunned and how can we heal them?” “How can we fix the pain before it has to explode?” And despite being such a compassionate cause to go this line of thinking, it all gets very complicated because the very act of doing something to fix or correct something from one person’s point of view will seem to cause hurt and suffering to some other person. The very act of trying to fix something is an act of judging that something is wrong with it. It seems that at best one can do is just sit in the midst of this frustration and just know that we are all human and know what it feels to be human, and accept how it so often doesn’t make any sense, and it goes beyond the capability of human reasoning. And the very act of sitting in the presence of those dark voices and nothing more is the most direct form of healing there is.

And so in my meditation under the gaze of the sun rising to bring in a new day, I bring my attention back to myself and my inner emotions. For what I have learned in my spiritual journey and in my training as an energy healer is that it’s not about “doing” it’s about “being” And in that being I begin to see the connection between who I am and how I feel within myself as a human and it’s reflection in others and the rest of the world around me. In other words the key to healing the unheard voices in the world that eventually break out into violent expression, is for each of us to heal the unheard voices within ourselves. And the healing is generally in the mere act of being quiet and patient and earnestly listening and feeling each spot in our bodies that doesn’t seem to feel quite right, but is generally more convenient to just ignore.

In meditation I can hear a critical voice say: “you’re mind is chattering too much … bring your attention back to the breath … you’re not being a good meditator” and then hear the counter critical voice of “stop being judgmental… that’s not very spiritual” And then I rise above and simply witness the chatter, actually encourage and allow the chatter to go thru and I give these critical voices permission to complain all they want. I hold them in love and know that to judge them is to suppress them, but to just listen to them and hold them in love simply because they exist, to let them know that they are like lost children of my soul that I so gratefully want to bring to light.

I visualize my healing of all these emotions within me like a clearing and dissipating of scattered pockets of dark storm clouds within my psyche. And then I see how my clearing of these clouds within me might also be clearing similar clouds in the skies of the global consciousness encircling Earth.

In the end each of you are so so important. Every aspect of you. And actually, most importantly those darker sides of you that you are afraid to show and acknowledge. Take more time to sit and do nothing and just be, listen and hold each dark part of you in love. Grant them the patience to come out and voice whatever and however they want. They don’t need to voice aloud, they only need to voice in the safe container of your body with your patient inner ear listening intently to the voice that is ultimately just you. All the voices are valid because they exist. All the voices are loved because they exist.

And I back away knowing that the dark unheard areas that are within me are being heard because I’m being compassionate to myself. I am basking in my own love. I am really grateful to have such a loving and patient me. I can feel like myself around myself. And somehow when I do this inner loving it’s also loving the rest of the world. In a way I believe the moment that I have healed all my inner wounds, so will the rest of humanity on Earth have been healed. The theme of the struggle within one bears commonality to the theme of the struggle of all.

And so I find myself able to look at humanity, despite all the violence and destruction that seems to occur, feel so moved to say to all of you: “I Love You.” I say “I Love You” most especially those that are judged as having dark motivations, I most especially say “I love you” I want to see you. I’m not saying this to the violent explosive outbursts that occur, but more on the so many more precursors to those outbursts, to the so many moments building up over many years of a person’s lifetime of having parts of them unheard, invalidated and feeling unfairly dismissed. These are the parts I say “I love you” I want you to be heard because you are important. You are important because you exist.

Please don’t hide away. I want you to be seen. I want you to be heard. I love you.

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